The Offer Comes First: A Reality Check for Today’s Candidates

As both a recruiting assistant in the legal industry and a mental health therapist, I spend a lot of time observing people — how they communicate, how they handle stress, how they approach opportunity, and how they view themselves in professional spaces. One thing I have been noticing more and more lately, especially among younger professionals, is a growing sense of entitlement surrounding the hiring process.

The legal market is definitely active right now. Firms are hiring, opportunities exist, and there is movement in ways we have not seen in years. But despite that, this is still very much a firm-driven market. Law firms are not scrambling to hire just anyone. They are willing to wait for candidates who genuinely fit their needs and who can immediately step in and contribute value.

From both a therapeutic and recruiting perspective, I think some people are entering interviews with the mindset that because the market is busy, they automatically hold all of the leverage. But hiring has always been a relationship. Firms are still looking for professionalism, responsiveness, emotional maturity, adaptability, and people who make the lives of the team around them easier — not harder.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with having standards, boundaries, or confidence in yourself. In fact, those things are important. But confidence without self-awareness can quickly turn into entitlement. I see candidates sometimes dismiss opportunities too quickly, communicate carelessly, expect unrealistic accommodations immediately, or approach interviews as though they are doing the firm a favor simply by showing up.

One thing I often think candidates forget is that the first goal is to get the offer. Once you have an offer, then you have options. Then you have leverage. Then you have the ability to thoughtfully evaluate culture, compensation, flexibility, long-term growth, and whether a role truly aligns with your life and goals. But if candidates approach the process with rigidity, defensiveness, or an inflated sense of leverage too early on, they sometimes prevent themselves from even getting to that stage.

At the end of the day, firms want people who are collaborative, thoughtful, prepared, and solution-oriented. The candidates who consistently stand out are usually not the loudest or most demanding — they are the ones who combine competence with emotional intelligence.

And honestly, some old sayings exist for a reason. “Beggars can’t be choosers” may sound harsh, but there is wisdom in remembering that opportunity still requires humility, effort, flexibility, and the ability to meet people where they are.

The market may be strong, but value still matters.